How To Create Your Own Love Spell Jar To Attract Love

Now, this is not a spell to make a specific person love you. That is coercive love magic, and it is generally agreed that it’s a bad freaking idea. The truth is, coercive love magic rarely gives you the results that you want it to. It comes with all kinds of drawbacks. It tends to create situations that are extremely emotionally fraught, and is just generally considered ethically dubious at the absolute best. At worst, you are violating the free will of the person you are supposedly in love with, and that is a truly horrendous thing to do to someone you’re supposed to care about.

If you are looking for a new lover, either for a long-term relationship or something more short-term and just for fun, you’re in the right place.

The Ins & Outs Of Love Magic

There are a few things we need to get out of the way about the best way to approach love magic before we actually start casting the spell. You want to give yourself the best chance of having the spell work in the way you want, and that is what this section is going to teach you. First, you’re going to want to take some time to write a list of the qualities that you want in this new lover. You want to think carefully about what you put on this list and the ramifications, both magically and in your mundane life, that those qualities will have.

For example, if you put on your list that you want a soulmate-level love, what you are essentially asking for is for your magic to turn you into a person who is compatible with that level of love. This means that you will be doing a speed run on absolutely all of your limitations and traumas surrounding love. That is not an easy journey. If that is what you truly want, if you’re in it to win it, and you really want the relationships to end all relationships, then by all means, use the word soulmate in your list. But know that if you say you want that, your magic is going to try and give you that, and it’s going to have to eradicate absolutely everything in you that is in conflict with you getting what you want. I really recommend prioritizing shadow work if you’re going to go this route.

This can also be used as a self-love spell jar! If you’re going to make it a self-love jar, you’ll want to make sure you write your own name on the petition paper and focus your list on how you would like to feel and act in your relationship with yourself.

Second, you’re going to want to think about the kind of experience that you want to have in this relationship. How does this person communicate with you? Do they text you frequently? Are they capable of having healthy conflict? Do they have compatible values with you? Are their religious and spiritual views compatible with yours? Getting these compatibility elements down on your list helps a ton to avoid meeting someone who, on the surface, meets your more superficial desires, like they’re attractive and you find them funny, and things of that nature. It ensures that you’re attracting someone you can actually have a relationship with. You don’t just want a person who checks the boxes on a superficial level. You want someone with whom you can engage in a relationship on an ongoing basis.

Again, whether you’re looking for something long-term or a short-term fling, this still matters. If you’re looking for something shorter-term, you really want to be finding someone who shares your desire for things to be light and short-term and low-commitment. That should be on your list. Think about the kind of experience you want to have, the qualities that the person would need to have for you to be able to have that experience comfortably, and make sure that you put those things down.

Finally, you want to think about your non-negotiables, things that you absolutely must have and things that you absolutely will not accept in a partner and get these down on your list. Yes, you can, in fact, write down the things you do not want on your list. If you don’t want someone who has a super busy job where they can only text you twice a week, then you need to make sure you put down on your list that they are very communicative and text you all the time. If you won’t accept dating anyone under 5’10”, you need to put that the person that you’re drawing in is 5’10 or taller.

Anything that is an absolute must, you can underline or star to ensure that your magic and your spirits know what is most important to you. You can even explain this during the casting of the spell. The forces that you are working with are listening. You can talk to them and tell them what you need and want. Just keep in mind that the longer your list is, the more challenging it may be for your spell to bring this person into your life. The more qualities and items you put on your list, the smaller your pool of potential lovers grows.

Now, if you’re looking for someone to be a life partner that you’re going to spend the rest of your life with, get extra specific. Put as many items down on a list as you want, because you really do want to make sure you’re getting the right person for that. Not just anyone will do.

If you’re just dating for fun and you’re not really looking to settle down, you can have a little more leeway into your list. You don’t have to have as many items; just get down the things that you think are the most important and see what shows up. You can be a lot more flexible when you’re not aiming for lifetime commitment.

Jar spells are also designed to be worked over time; it’s not a single casting spell, it is a weekly spell, or a monthly spell, depending on how urgently you feel like meeting this person, so this list can actually be adjusted over time. If you change your mind about something or feel like you need to add something, you can do that when it occurs to you. This is not set in stone; you can take this list and change it as often as you need or want, so get down the list to the best of your ability right now, but if it changes later, you are allowed to change it, so don’t stress about getting it absolutely perfect right up front.

With those details out of the way, let’s jump into the spell itself!

The Love Drawing Jar

This is going to be a bit of a build-your-own-adventure spell. Everyone who makes one of these spell jars is going to want and need a slightly different kind of love, so what I’ve created here is a template that you can mix and match to create something that is unique to you and your situation.

This spell has a few key components that can be adjusted to suit your needs. Obviously, because this is a jar spell, you’re going to need a jar. That part is pretty cut and dry. From that point, you’re going to need a selection of herbs and ingredients as well as a candle. After that, we’ll consider any additional ingredients you might want to add. These might be things like magical oils, such as a Venus oil or a love oil or Cleopatra oil, or you might choose to add symbolic objects, magical items, or taglocks. Just know that this is not a spell that can only be done one way. I want you to customize this and make it yours as much as possible. So let’s just take this step-by-step.

The first step is that you’re going to need to get yourself a glass jar. This is going to need to be a smallish jar with a lid. I like the eight-ounce mason jars, the small cylindrical ones, but if you have a leftover jelly jar or something along those lines, that is totally fine. You just want it to be big enough to hold everything that you’re going to put into it and to have a lid that will be able to support having a candle placed on top of it. Those are really the only things that you need for your jar. It doesn’t have to be super pretty. It doesn’t have to be a specific color. Just about anything will do as long as it meets those requirements.

Next, the majority of your jar is going to be filled with herbs and other ingredients. So when we are talking about other ingredients, we mean things like sugar, honey, maybe essential oils, magnetic sand, things of that nature.

Here’s a list of ingredients you could add to your spell jar and what each of them is going to do.

• Honey – A honey jar spell is used in folk magic to make people feel sweeter toward you. This will encourage positive feelings and loving energy in the people around you.
• Sugar – This is another sweetener you can use for your love spells. It tends to be faster but less “sticky” than honey, leading to quick burst results. Great if you just need an icebreaker to encourage potential lovers to approach you.
• Rose petals – This is a go-to in many love spells, but know that it has some seriously spicy undertones! Rose is a plant of passion and sexuality, so it’s amazing if you want a passionate relationship.
• Cardamom – Another passion-driven plant. Cardamom is great for increasing attraction and lust and fostering that spark in a new romantic relationship.
• Nutmeg – Used for loyalty and fidelity. If you want a stable, ride or die type of relationship, this herb is perfect.
• Lavender – Good for that peaceful, sweet, devoted kind of love. It can be a little too sedating, so pair it with a passion herb, otherwise it can snuff out the heat of attraction.
• Damiana – Excellent for drawing new lovers and boosting confidence and sexual attraction
• Vetiver – Attracts deep connections and deepens existing connections. 
• Catnip – Particularly good for women looking to attract men, creates a fun, lighthearted attraction.
• Lemon peel – Straight up joy. Sunny, bright happiness. Lemon peel amplifies all good things.
• Cinnamon stick – This can help to speed things up and also add a little kick to your love magic. It has that fiery spicy energy, so expect the results to match.
• Rose quartz crystals – If you’re looking for that true love kind of energy, add rose quartz
• Magnetic Sand – This amplifies the drawing power of the spell. Highly recommended if you’re drawing in new lovers!

I would suggest you choose anywhere from 3 to 5 of these ingredients that match what you want to draw into your life with this spell. These are certainly not the only options, so if you have other herbs or ingredients you’d like to add, you’re welcome to do so as long as you know what effect those additions will have. I would recommend NOT adding salt to your jar! Salt is used to strip away or purify, and isn’t compatible with this kind of spell.

Next, you’ll need to pick a candle, and you can choose any color of candle that you want. For example, if you want something fiery and passionate, you might choose a red candle. If you’re looking for a little bit more of a sweet courtship or a  best friend-lover situation, you might use a pink candle. If you want that pure soulmate type love, you might choose a white candle. There are no wrong answers here. You can even choose something like a green candle to represent Venusian energy. You don’t have to overthink this; choose what feels right for your situation. I generally use a chime candle for this kind of spell, something that takes 1-2 hours to burn.

After that, you can call it done, or you can add some extra components to your spell. Here are some examples:

• Magical oils: Venus oil, Cleopatra oil, any kind of drawing, love, or attraction oil. These would be used to dress the candle and/or petition paper.
• Talismans or magical items – Things like a Venusian talisman, Venus pentacles, or a tarot card like the 10 of Cups or The Lovers
• Items associated with any spirits or deities you intend to petition in this spell

Once you’ve decided what all is going to go into your spell, it’s time to get casting.

You will start by collecting all of your items in one place, and then, one by one, you will awaken each item. First, you will awaken the jar itself, then all of the materials you plan to use for the base. One by one, you will awaken each ingredient, make your petitions, and place it in the jar. The order and organization of it is really up to you and your personal taste, but I recommend that if you’re going to use honey, you add it last.

When you have all of your items and herbs awakened and placed in your jar, you will screw the lid on and place your lover drawing list underneath the jar. Next, you’ll anoint your candle if you’re using an oil and place your candle on top of the jar either in a candle holder or by melting the bottom and sticking it to the lid. Light your candle and speak your petitions aloud if you like. Ask the spirits of the herbs, candle, and fire to bring you the kind of lover you seek. Allow the candle to burn itself out, and you’re done.

Now, this kind of spell is designed to be repeated. You will keep the list and jar, and once a month, anoint a new candle and burn it on top of the jar while speaking your petitions aloud. By doing this, you can keep the spell active and working for you until you have found the relationship you want!

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Updated on February 17, 2026 by Avery Hart